People say women hate women the most all the time. They say females are females greatest enemies. Well it’s true that ladies hate ladies, it’s true that we say bad stuff about each other. It is also true that women set standards for other females to meet, and get mad when they are not up to the standards of other women, then try to bring such ladies down. Now before you get mad, you need to understand that this is only a certain class of women. Majority of female folks who act like this are insecure about themselves, they then make themselves feel better by pulling other women down. Now you may start to wonder, ‘why are women so insecure?’ ‘Why do females hate each other?’

Of course there is a reason women hate each other and this has a lot to do with the way girls are being raised in our society. Chimamanda Ngozi Adiche, a popular writer and also a feminist said on Beyonce’s popular song, ‘Flawless’ – “…we raise girls to see each other as competitors, not for jobs or accomplishments which I think could be a good thing, but for the attention of men…” This is the major reason females hate females. Raising girls to compete for the attention of males is basically placing men in a high position, as though they are trophies, and definitely, competitors do not like each other because they all want the same thing, hence the jealousy and hatred.

If you look at the major reasons some women express dislike for other ladies, it often relates to guys. For example; Ayesha Curry getting dragged by females for saying she likes to cover up and not expose her body the way some other ladies prefer to. This was in fact a very hilarious reason to get mad at someone, especially because she was talking about her own personal preference and not setting standards for other women. But she still got dragged, and that was because quite a number of men praised her for that. Amber Rose on the other hand posts naked pictures and gets dragged, majorly by guys. But guess who comes to her rescue, females. Why? Because she was getting dragged by men. The only logical explanation for the two scenarios is ‘jealousy’. The women who dragged Ayesha Curry did so because they felt like she was better than them for doing the supposedly right thing by covering her body, and was therefore being praised for it. If we observe closely, the ladies who dragged her support women liberation, but they somehow still feel affected by what conservative people feel about them, which makes them insecure. They want to be seen as ‘okay’ but are scared other females could be seen as their better, so their ‘liberation’ isn’t really liberation, it’s more like consolation. They seek equality, but pull everyone who does not share the same belief with them down, they claim to speak for everyone, and meanwhile they only listen to their own voices. While Amber Rose got support because she was speaking for this so-called liberal women. She got support because she wasn’t threatening, there was nothing to be jealous about and because men didn’t appreciate her. If males had given her a round of applause and probably called her ‘wife material’, trust another group of women to be after her tail. This is not to say that Amber Rose also got dragged by a few ladies, I’ll call them ‘non liberal’ and of course, we already know what that is about. 

This simple explanation is the same reason Yvonne Orji got shamed by some women for remaining a virgin and Amber Rose is praised for organizing the slut-shame movement. It is the same reason makeup artists get praised and Alicia Keys gets insulted for going to the Grammys without makeup. All of this does not in any way mean that men the devils, it only means that the society is flawed. The only solution to this is to change the way girls are raised. Teach them to not depend on the attention of men, help them to learn to put themselves first and be comfortable in their own skin, tell them marriage is not the most important thing, teach them to be independent as guys are. If these changes aren’t made, ladies will continue to see each other as competitors, men as trophies and continue to hate each other. And for the females who are adults already, learn more about liberation. Understand that people have the rights to make their own choices, whether or not the choices suit you or whether or not you believe in the choices. 

Feminism is a choice, not another way of imprisoning people and making them do your bidding, so you can feel less bad about yourself. Feminism isn’t about you, it’s about everyone.

This is only my opinion, you can share yours in the comment section below, also like the post if you enjoyed reading it and share, thank you!

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